The Indian And The Cowboy

While riding one day a cowboy met an Indian riding along with a dog and a sheep and began a conversation.

Cowboy: “Hey, cool dog you got there. Mind if I speak to him?”

Indian: “Dog no talk.”

Cowboy: “Hey dog, how’s it going?”

Dog: “Doin’ alright.”

Indian: Look of shock.

Cowboy: “Is this Indian your owner?” pointing at the Indian.

Dog: “Yep”

Cowboy: “How does he treat you?”

Dog: “Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food, and takes me to the lake once a week to play.”

Indian: Look of total disbelief.

Cowboy: “Mind if I talk to your horse?”

Indian: “Horse no talk.”

Cowboy: “Hey horse, how’s it going?”

Horse: “Cool.”

Indian: Extreme look of shock.

Cowboy: “Is this your owner? ” pointing at Indian

Horse: “Yep”

Cowboy: “How’s he treat you?”

Horse: “Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often, and keeps me in a shed to protect me.”

Indian: Total look of utter amazement.

Cowboy: “Mind if I talk to your sheep?”

Indian: “Sheep liar.”

“I’d Like To Shoot Par Golf Regularly.”

While playing golf, the man finds a corked bottle on the green. Upon opening it, a genie appears and grants the fellow one wish. After thinking about it for a while, the man says, “I’d like to shoot par golf regularly.”

“No problem,” says the genie, “But understand that your sex life will be greatly reduced as a side effect.”

I can handle that,” the man says, and POOF, the deed is done. Several months later, the genie reappears on the same golf hole and asks the man how his golf game is doing.

“Fantastic!” says the man, “I’m now carrying a scratch handicap.” “And what effect has it had on your sex life?” the genie inquires. “I still manage to have relations 2-3 times a month,” the fellow answers calmly.

“2-3 times a month,” the genie says, “That’s not much of a sex life.”

“Well,” the fellow responds, “I don’t think it’s too bad for a middle-aged priest with a very small parish.”